Restoration of Love
Restoration of Love
By: R. L. Kane
Restoration of Love
This book is protected under the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976. All rights are reserved.
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, places, or events is coincidental. Names of places and characters are intended to be fictional.
© 2013 by DreamWood Publishing
CHAPTER ONE
Nikki Mills looked up from the mountain of files on her desk at the clock on the office wall. Twenty minutes after 4:00. Nikki felt the familiar sharp pain in her heart, which meant that she was about to start crying again. In less than four hours, she would be driving her only son, Brandon, to George Bush Airport. Brandon had been accepted to a top-notch college in Atlanta. She was so proud of him, but had secretly hoped he would choose a school in Texas, where he would be closer to her. But, Brandon had made up his mind to go college in Atlanta after he visited his father there two summers ago.
Nikki tried to keep her disappointment to herself and not let Brandon know how hurt she was that he was going so far away. He often reminded her that he was no longer a boy, but a man. She accepted that, but couldn’t help but feel a twinge of jealousy every time she thought about Brandon and his father spending so much time together.
Nikki and Trent Mills had divorced four years earlier when Brandon was only thirteen. She had never given her son the specifics of the divorce, but she knew that he was smart enough to figure it out. Trent had cheated on her with someone he met at his legal practice. By the time Nikki had suspected something was wrong with her marriage and confronted her husband, he simply told her that he was in love with someone else and wanted a divorce.
After she got over the initial shock and humiliation at the demise of what she considered to be the perfect marriage, Nikki knew she had to focus on preparing a life for herself and her son. At first, Brandon wanted nothing to do with his father. But Nikki talked to him relentlessly and assured him that no matter what happened between her and Trent, his father still loved him.
Not long after the divorce, Trent remarried and moved to Atlanta. After that, contact between Brandon and Trent had become almost non-existent. Nikki grew weary of calling Trent and reminding him that he still had a son who would be a man soon and that these were the years he needed his guidance the most.
Nikki was determined to be both mother and father to her son, even taking him on Saturdays to the local barbershop where she was usually the only female sitting in a room full of men. If he played in a baseball or football game, she was there. She felt especially proud when Brandon, rather than opting out of going to a father/son football banquet, asked her to go with him in place of his father.
But now, the thing she dreaded most was about to happen. She was losing her son. She knew that once he stepped foot on that plane, a whole new world would open up to him. A world that she would no longer be a part of.
Just as she felt the tears run down her face, her best friend, Tia, appeared over the partition separating their desks.
“Girl, you crying again? Why don’t you just leave? You’re getting more tears than ink on those files!” Tia teased.
Nikki grabbed a tissue out of the box on her desk and looked up at her friend. “Tia, I’m going to miss him so much,” she said tearfully, “For so long my whole existence has revolved around being his mother. I just don’t know who I am without him.”
Tia looked at her compassionately and said, “ Well, I think it’s time you found out. You said it yourself, Nik, for so long your world has revolved around your son. You’ve done your job. Brandon is a wonderful young man. Now it’s time to let go and experience being single. It’s time for you now.”
Nikki placed the stacks of files on her desk and reached for her suit jacket. “I might as well go home. I’m not getting much done here. I should have taken the day off, but Brandon wanted to say some last goodbyes to his friends and I figured that being at home watching the clock would be worse.”
“Go ahead, girl. I’ll cover for you and you can return the favor on Friday, when I leave early for my hot date with the investment banker I was telling you about.”
Nikki forced a smile and headed for the door.
The bright sunshine outside only seemed to make a mockery out of the way she felt inside…dull and drab.
CHAPTER TWO
Nikki didn’t even remember driving home from the office. Her thoughts were only on what she would do when tomorrow came and she would no longer hear the front door slam and Brandon calling to her or hear the phone ringing incessantly for him. She would no longer be yelling, “Turn that rap music down!” She knew that she’d better pull herself together before Brandon came home to finish packing. She did not want him to see her like this.
She decided that she would take a shower and perhaps a short nap since she had not slept well the night before. As Nikki slept, she dreamed of past years when she, Trent, and Brandon were a happy family. She dreamed that they were at the park on one of their Sunday outings. Trent was grilling hot dogs, she was lying on a blanket, reading, and Brandon was playing with his puppy, Rags. As the peaceful slumber started to leave her, Nikki willed herself to stay asleep where it was safe. Stay asleep where she could have everything exactly the way it used to be. But, the minute she heard the thumping sound of music vibrating from Brandon’s room, she knew it was time to face the inevitable. Even before Nikki looked at the clock on the night stand, she knew it was time to dress and take her baby to the airport.
She walked down the hall to his room to make sure that he had finished packing. To her surprise, the door was open and Nikki took one long last look at her man/boy that she had raised virtually alone for the last four years. Brandon was already 6’3”, taller than his father and much taller than his mother. His caramel colored skin was exactly the same tone as hers. People who didn’t know them often mistook them for brother and sister. He had his father’s big, brown eyes, but everything else was his mother.
Nikki could not have been prouder of her son. Not only was he a handsome, bright, articulate young man, but also he had character. All his life, Nikki tried to instill in him the importance of being honest, trustworthy and a man of his word. All the things that his father was not, or at least hadn’t been with her.
However, Nikki knew that there were things she hadn’t taught him. Not because she didn’t want to, but because she didn’t know how. There were skills that he had learned all on his own like how to throw a baseball, how to fish and how to hunt. More importantly, she worried that she had not taught him what to do when he had his heart broken for the first time. She had been divorced from his father for four years now and still had not taught herself how to handle the pain. She still didn’t know how to handle hearing Trent’s voice on the phone. She still didn’t know how to avoid the pain of reaching for him in the middle of the night only to wake, remembering that it wasn’t her bed that he shared anymore.
As she watched Brandon bounce to the rhythm of the music vibrating from his small speakers, she smiled as she thought how blessed she was. This son of hers had never given her a moment’s trouble. Oh, he had his rebellious moments like most teenagers do, like testing his curfew or wanting to drive before Nikki thought he was ready. But, overall she couldn’t have asked for a better kid. Silently, she wished that she could capture this moment and hold onto it forever. Brandon, interrupting her thoughts said softly, “Mom, are you okay?”
“Yes Son, I’m fine. I just wanted to make sure you have everything you need,” she said smiling at him.
“Yeah, I’m straight. Oh Mom, we aren’t going to have to call out the medics at the airport, are we?” he asked jokingly. “You gonna be able to control the water wor
ks?”
Nikki answered him by picking up a shirt off of his bed and throwing it at him. That evening, she left his room without telling him to turn the music down. She reminded herself sadly that it would be a long time before she this house was full of rap music again.
CHAPTER THREE
Nikki and Brandon arrived at the airport only thirty minutes before his plane was scheduled to leave. Not only had they gotten a late start, but also there had been an accident on the freeway that delayed their trip. Brandon checked in and was talking on his cell phone while Nikki absent-mindedly leafed through a magazine. Nikki’s head jerked up when she heard Brandon’s flight announced over the loud speaker.
“Flight 452 to Atlanta, Georgia now boarding. Flight 452 to Atlanta, Georgia now boarding.” Would the customer service rep have announced it so non-chalantly if she knew that Nikki’s heart was breaking?
Brandon grabbed his black Nike bag and looked at her with concern in his eyes, “Well, Mom, that’s me. Are you gonna be all right?”
“It’s gonna be party time every night of the week,” she smiled trying to muster up whatever humor she could find.
“Mom, listen,” Brandon said, his voice suddenly sounding serious. “I left something for you on the kitchen table. That’s why I ran back in the house at the last minute. I didn’t want you to see it until I was gone.”
Nikki looked at him with sadness and confusion as she wondered what he could have left behind for her.
“Gimme a hug,” Brandon continued as he pulled her into his lanky arms. When Nikki realized that the next time she would see him would be Thanksgiving, the tears started and she sobbed uncontrollably.
“Mom, stop”, Brandon pleaded gently, “You knew this day would come.
“But, I didn’t think it would come so soon”, Nikki said through her tears. “Promise to call me as soon as you land. I don’t care what time it is and then call me again when you get to your father’s house.
“Mom, I will. Stop worrying. I’ll be fine, you’ll see.” She could hear a touch of annoyance in his voice and knew she had to let go.
“I know. I know you will.” But, just the thought of Brandon being fine without made it even harder for her to hold back the tears.
Brandon let go of her and headed toward the long hallway that led to the plane that would take him thousands of miles away from her. Nikki stood there and watched until he was out of her sight. Seemingly frozen, she stood in the same spot for several minutes, expecting him to miraculously turn around and run back to her, saying that he had changed his mind and decided to go to school in Texas after all. When he didn’t come back, Nikki wiped her tears and turned into her future alone.
CHAPTER FOUR
By the time Nikki reached home, it was dark and a light rain had begun to fall. She pulled the small SUV into the garage and turned on the house lights with the remote. As she entered the kitchen through the garage, she gasped. With her mind on Brandon’s flight, she completely forgot that he said that he had left her something. But what she saw took her breath away. On the kitchen table were the most beautiful red roses that Nikki had ever seen. In front of the roses was a card with ‘Mom’ written on it. Nikki took one of the roses out of the vase and held it against her nose. She picked up the card and began reading it.
“Dear Mom, I hope you like the flowers. I wanted to give them to you in person, but I know how you are. Mom, thank you for everything that you have done for me. No matter how big of a brat I was, you were always in my corner. Mom, my wish for you is that you look at my leaving as a new beginning for you and your life, not as an end. Go out, meet new people, have fun. Even hook up with someone, just let me check him out first (smile). Seriously, Mom, you’re a beautiful, caring, giving person. Don’t waste your life away just working, coming home and watching TV. There’s more to life than that. Give yourself permission to live. Most of all, give yourself permission to love. Love forever, Brandon.”
By the time Nikki finished reading Brandon’s card, the tears saturated her face but this time instead of trying to wipe them away, she let herself cry until there were no more tears. Then she did something she had not done in a very long time. She got down on her knees and she thanked God that he had brought her this far.
CHAPTER FIVE
Nikki’s first night alone was much easier than she had imagined it would be. She passed the evening by talking on the phone to Tia, listening to her recap her latest dating escapade. As usual, in Tia’s mind, whomever she was dating at the moment was definitely ‘the one’.
After washing her hair, Nikki decided that tomorrow she would make a hair appointment and update her look. She always kept her beautiful black hair up in a very conservative style. It was time for a change. Now that Brandon was gone, she was going to try to focus a little more on herself. She had even thought of updating her wardrobe. Tia would have to help her with that. She popped in a DVD and settled in front of the TV to watch a movie. She must have dozed off because she awoke to the ringing of the telephone.
“Mom, it’s me,” Brandon’s voice said over the ancient remote recorder, “Pick up the phone if you’re there.”
Still in a sleepy daze, Nikki almost broke her neck getting to the phone.
“Hello,” she said, trying not to sound like she just woke up.
“I should have known you were there,” Brandon said, “Where else would you be?”
“All right, smart mouth,” Nikki said playfully. “Brandon, is your plane just now landing? It’s way past two AM.”
“No, Mom. We landed almost two hours ago. Dad picked me up at the airport and I meant to call you, but I was so excited about seeing Dad, and then we went to dinner and time just got away. I’m sorry.”
“Brandon, let me speak to your father,” Nikki said with more annoyance in her voice then she meant to show.
“Hello”, came Trent’s deep baritone voice over the phone.
“Well, now you have what you always wanted…my son,” she snapped. “The least you could have done was been considerate enough to have him call me when he got off the plane.”
“Well, hello to you, too, Nikki. I’m sorry he forgot to call you, but he isn’t a baby anymore. He’s almost eighteen years old. You’ve got to learn to cut those apron strings. Let him start experiencing life on his own. Oh and by the way, he’s our son.”
“Is that what you did when you left, Trent,” she said sarcastically, “Experienced life on you own?”
“Listen, Nikki,” Trent said, clearly irritated, “I’m not going to have this conversation with you again. I left a marriage that wasn’t working. I didn’t leave Brandon. Yes, you can call me a coward because it was easier for me just not to call there if I had to go round and round with you. But, I’ve stepped up now and I want to be a part of our son’s life. That’s why I wanted him to stay here with me and Tracy rather than living in some dorm room.”
“Tracy. You just had to find a way to bring her name into the conversation, didn’t you?”
“Look, Nikki, I’m tired. Brandon’s tired. We’re going to bed. I’ll tell Brandon to call you tomorrow.” With that Trent hung up before Nikki could say anything else.
“Damn him. Damn him for thinking he could just steal my child out from under me.”
When the phone rang again, Nikki picked it up quickly without looking at the caller I.D., assuming it was Brandon calling her back. After realizing who it was, Nikki wished she had let it ring. “Hello, Momma,” Nikki said wearily.
“Nikki!” her mother screeched into the phone, “ I thought I told you that I wanted to go to the airport with you to see my only grandson off. I’ve been calling you all evening. Shame on you for keeping me up until this hour trying to reach you.”
“Sorry, Momma. The ringer must have been turned off,” Nikki lied.
Although she loved her mother, their relationship was not as close as Nikki would have liked. Her mother could be judgemental and without patience when it came to Nikki, but dote
d on Nikki’s younger sister, Gina. Gina was born with a slight limp in her right leg and to her mother it meant that Gina would be disabled for the rest of her life. Of course her mother made a big deal out of it as she did everything else that concerned Gina. Gina, however, actually did quite well for herself, becoming a high profile attorney, while Nikki opted to drop out of law school to become a legal assistant after marrying Trent. Additionally, Gina married an attorney with his own practice while Trent accepted a position in a small local law firm. In her mother’s eyes, Nikki had merely settled, both with her life and her career, and she never let Nikki forget it. Although Nikki’s father, God rest his soul, had worked as a machinist for some thirty years before retiring and her mother was a homemaker, Alma still set high standards for her two daughters. Two years after Nikki’s dad retired, he died suddenly, leaving her mother alone. In the twelve years that followed, her mother never even considered dating much less remarrying.
“Sometimes I swear you have rocks for brains, Girl.” Her mother scolded, “If you didn’t want me to go with you tonight, the least you could have done was told me!”
Nikki rolled her eyes to the ceiling thinking how her mother would react if she could see her. She had thought about calling her mother before she left, but she was already upset with Brandon’s leaving and didn’t need the additional stress of hearing her mother go on about how she should have tried harder to keep her marriage together so that Brandon would still be here in Texas where he belonged. Nikki distracted her mother by asking about her sister, Gina. If there was anything that her mother loved to talk about, it was Gina. Nikki listened to her mother rave about her sister for the next ten minutes and then yawned dramatically into the phone and saying she was tired and needed to get some rest.